In today’s highly charged political climate, the problem of overinflated egos is very much front and center. For me, the current political campaign season has highlighted how an amplified sense of self-importance can lead to divisive rhetoric and hinder effective governance. No matter your political stance, you’ve likely found yourself turned off by the egotism of politicians who constantly put their self-aggrandizing egos on public display.
But this phenomenon is not confined to politics alone; it also extends into public safety. Whether you’re in the fire service, the emergency medical service, law enforcement or corrections, the consequences of ego-driven leadership can be profoundly detrimental, affecting team cohesion, public trust and overall effectiveness in critical, high-stakes situations.
Since we’re entrusted with ensuring safety, providing essential services and maintaining order, we first responders tend to see ourselves as pillars of the community. However, when we allow our egos to overshadow our duties, it can lead to a toxic work environment, poor decision-making and breakdowns in communication. I’d like to explore the pervasive issue of overinflated egos within public safety, underscoring the importance of developing humility and collaborative leadership as we serve the public good.
Are you honest with your ego?
Unfortunately, I think many leaders get so steeped in their own egos, they don’t even see how ridiculous they look to others. So, I’ll ask you: Is your ego being honest with you or are you being honest with your ego?
Why do so many people in positions of authority act in ways that make it clear they feel superior to those they lead? I think one reason is they think their leadership roles make them better than other people. In other words, if you tear everyone else down, who is left standing? You are, and it makes you feel superior to everyone else. Behind this is pride — the kind of pride that says, “I am better than you are.”
This attitude is wrong, not just in the eyes of other people but also in the eyes of just about every moral philosophy on Earth. The Bible warns, “Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall” (Proverbs 16:18). Similarly, the Torah tells us a good leader “will not act haughtily toward his fellows” (Deuteronomy 17:20) and the Qur’an notes, “Is there not in Hell an abode for the proud?” (Surah az-Zumar 39:60). There seems to be a universal disdain for prideful, puffed-up people, and yet egotists seem to be multiplying.
I see the same pride and ego very much in evidence in many of the leaders I interact with in the fire service. In fact, I have talked with personnel from many agencies that are experiencing an ego crisis within their departments.
Keeping your ego in check
Police1.com recently published an article in their leadership development series that provides strategies to keep your ego in check. The blinking neon signs of someone with an inflated ego are easy to identify: “The rules don’t apply to me” and “Do as I say, not as I do” are some of the common attitudes they display.
While not all issues associated with ego or insecurity result in criminal acts or scandals, a leader’s uncontrolled ego can contribute to an inefficient, ineffective, unsafe and possibly toxic work environment. The earlier a supervisor recognizes and addresses their issues with ego, the better chance they have of adopting strategies to develop some much-needed humility.
President Abraham Lincoln famously said, “If you want to test a man’s character, give him power.” In his article on Police1.com, Chief Ron Camacho quotes author and media strategist Ryan Holiday, saying, “Most of us aren’t egomaniacs, but ego is there at the root of almost every conceivable problem and obstacle, from why we can’t win to why we need to win all the time and at the expense of others.”
Camacho provides five tips to help supervisors become “humble, confident and influential leaders”:
- Find a mentor or coach: We all need guidance at times, and a good mentor or coach can help you learn to manage your ego. A mentor offers career advice based on their personal experience, helping you avoid common pitfalls. On the other hand, an executive coach can encourage you to find your own solutions through a process that inspires. While executive coaching is common in the corporate world, the public safety world has been slow to accept it.
- Develop self-awareness: Understanding your own motivations, desires and feelings can be key to keeping your ego in check. People who are more self-aware see themselves more clearly, leading to increased confidence, stronger relationships and more effective communication. It’s important to recognize how others perceive you as well. To enhance self-awareness, ask yourself “what” questions instead of “why” questions, as the former tend to be more objective and solutions-focused.
- Adopt an “it’s not about me” philosophy: Leaders with large egos often exhibit selfishness. To counteract this, prioritize your team’s needs over your own by reminding yourself that leadership is not about personal achievements. It can be helpful to use visual reminders like notes or wristbands to reinforce this mantra. Focusing on your team over yourself helps build trust and fosters a positive work environment.
- Read and research: Learn from history to avoid the pitfalls of an unchecked ego. Study leaders from various fields—politicians, military generals, corporate figures—and try to understand the consequences of their mistakes. There are many resources available, from books to online videos, that offer insights on overcoming ego and developing self-awareness.
- Lead by example: Accountability is crucial to keeping your ego in check. By setting a standard and adhering to it, you’ll be able to better inspire and motivate your team. Leading by example fosters trust and loyalty, while ignoring your own rules and standards of behavior can lead to conflict within your department. Consistently maintaining high standards helps manage your ego and strengthens your leadership.
The sword of damocles
In Spider-Man, Peter Parker’s Uncle Ben tells him, “With great power comes great responsibility.” This hearkens back to a principle illustrated in the ancient Greek story, the Sword of Damocles, about the peril faced by those in positions of power.
Damocles, a courtier to King Dionysius II of Syracuse, expressed envy at the wealth and power held by the monarch. To teach him a lesson, Dionysius offered to switch places with Damocles for a day. While Damocles enjoyed the luxuries of kingship, he soon noticed a sharp sword hanging precariously above his throne, suspended by a single strand of horsehair. This threat overshadowed his enjoyment, making him realize the constant danger and anxiety inherent in great power. The tale serves as a reminder that leadership comes with the responsibility to do right by those we are charged with leading.
It’s important to keep your ego in check. In an article in Psychology Today, author Steven Stosney notes that we defend the ego through “argument, criticism, sarcasm, and coercion.” During moments when our egos feel particularly vulnerable, our instinct is to safeguard our own sense of self-worth through aggressive actions such as attack or retaliation, often disregarding truth and fairness. Facts can either be wielded as weapons or ignored altogether when our egos are under threat.
Whether it’s in a firehouse, a police station, a corporate board room or a political campaign, this is unacceptable.
Defending our egos
Besides highlighting ways we instinctively defend our egos, Stosney also explores how these ego defenses can lead to a cycle of hopelessness. Rather than resolving underlying issues or conflicts, defensive behaviors can perpetuate negative emotions and make bad situations even worse. He suggests a shift toward greater self-awareness and emotional regulation could offer a more constructive approach to handling ego threats.
By fostering a deeper understanding of our triggers and responses, leaders can potentially break free from the cycle of defensive behaviors and cultivate more resilient and adaptive ways of coping with challenges to their egos. In essence, Stosney asks us to reflect on how we defend our egos and consider alternative strategies that are more likely to promote personal growth and emotional well-being.
To sustain hope and foster positivity, Stosney suggests doing the following:
- Stay true to humane values.
- Eliminate negative labels.
- Reserve judgment; be more curious than judgmental.
Also, working with coworkers and direct reports is much easier when leaders:
- Show respect.
- Argue to learn, not to win.
- Focus on behaviors or ideas, not character.
When leaders follow this advice, they may find it completely unnecessary to defend their egos because the friction between leaders and those they lead is greatly reduced. The impulse to protect the ego gives way to a stronger inclination toward authenticity and optimism.
Accentuate the positive
The current political landscape vividly illustrates how unchecked egos can devolve into divisive rhetoric, leaving little room for genuine collaboration or meaningful dialogue. As we confront the pervasive issue of egotism in public safety, it’s crucial to acknowledge its profound implications for leadership and organizational effectiveness. This self-centered approach not only erodes public trust but also undermines the very foundations of effective public service.
To counteract these tendencies in public safety professions, it’s important that leaders prioritize humility, self-awareness and collaborative leadership. By fostering an environment where ego-driven behaviors are actively challenged and replaced with a commitment to collective well-being and professionalism, we can cultivate stronger teams and restore public confidence. Through these principles, we can aspire to build a future where ego takes a backseat to compassion and accountability — ensuring that our actions reflect the noble responsibilities entrusted to us.
